Monday, June 20, 2022

I am not an island...





Island - a piece of land surrounded by water.

I spent a week on an island....I did not once cross the bridge to the mainland...not a single time. Everything I needed was provided on that island. It was time away from the busyness of the world. It was a time to slow down, to enjoy family, to laugh, to eat unbelievable amounts of food, to just be.... and to remember......and to forget the world for just a time. The memories didn't seem to sting as much this year....there were no tears this trip.....just sweet conversations and precious, precious laughter among the memories.....

As I sit and write this morning I'm reminded of this verse:

"And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus."
Philippians 4:19

And he did last week. I am so incredibly grateful.

I was excited about getting away AND found it hard to leave home all at the same time. I "religiously" put on a beautiful necklace my best friend gifted to me shortly after my husband's death....it feels like I am purposely taking a part of him with me. The necklace reads, "To the world you were just one person but to me you were the world." It has another charm that reads "husband" and two charms representing him and I. It's precious to me...not only because of the kindness and love of the giver but because it represents how I feel each time I leave "our" home.

See, this world, outside my intimate circle, doesn't know my beloved. People look at me and they don't know my story, my heartache, my burdens, my joys nor my sorrows. In my own circumstances I am an island. I can't head back to the "mainland" where all is right again. In fact, the "mainland" IS a myth. Something I create. It's fluffy! All is well! No sorrow, no pain...no heartaches, no death, plenty of what I want and all that I need. And when I am happy that means that my children and grandchildren and family also have all that they need. That existence is neither real or possible.

I look at the island I envision and am immediately reminded of Jesus' words in Revelation:

"He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’ or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” He who was seated on the throne said, “I am making everything new!” Then he said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.”
Revelation 21:4‭-‬5

Oh my goodness! YES! I desire heaven on earth!

When I try to live IN the world, but not OF the world, disappointment and dissolution seep in and shatter my "beautiful plan" every.single.time. Makes me sad when I put myself on the throne...thinking I know better than the one who created me. Doesn't even make me feel better to know that others do the same thing. Misery loves company? Not so much......

I am NOT the island. I am NOT the one supplying all the needs. I am NOT all-sufficient. I am NOT an island unto myself. GOD is the all-sufficient one. GOD is the supplier of all my needs. GOD is the Alpha and Omega.....the Beginning and the End. GOD is the one who says, "Follow me and you'll never be thirsty again." GOD says, "I am the vine and you are the branches." GOD says, "I will supply ALL of your needs." GOD says, "I'm going away to build a house for you and I'll come back and get you." GOD says, "I will wipe away every tear." GOD says, "MY power is made perfect in weakness." GOD says, "Come to me ALL who are weary and I WILL give you rest." God's Word says so much more.... God IS the island and he bids me, "Come, rest with me. Come, I AM your rest. I AM your peace. I WILL supply ALL of your needs. I AM your island...I am THE island...the place you can escape to find rest for your soul."

As I sit here on my porch on this cool summer morning.... the birds chirping and the gentle breeze soothes my anxious thoughts of what lies ahead today. Re-entry is hard. Leaving the island and the time away from the mainland was good and profitable for me. It was what He knew I needed. But the island isn't really gone. God isn't gone. He is my respite. He is my ever present help in trouble. He never leaves me or forsakes me. I have my own beautiful island, Jesus Christ. All goes "south" when I choose to leave the Island...when I choose to live on the mainland. Everytime I allow my thoughts and actions to move me from the Island to the mainland I lose my promised peace and my sense of direction. And I forget:

".....being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.
Philippians 1:6


God's not done with me yet. I am not complete. I am on a journey. Not once, EVER, am I told to leave the Island and go out on my own. Not once, EVER, does God instruct me to do something he has not empowered me to do. Time and time again he stands on the shore and shouts to me, "Dianna, come back!! I've got what you need!" And sometimes, sadly, I keep rowing.

I'm so thankful for God's Word. It fills me, it teaches me, it corrects my wrong thinking, it comforts me and it gives me great joy.

I know there will be times I leave the Island, perhaps even knowing I shouldn't...but....I remain confident of this, that he who began a good work in me will carry it on to completion until the day Jesus calls me home for eternity.

No comments:

Rest in his arms....

"Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego replied to him, “King Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. If ...