Friday, October 21, 2022

Rest in his arms....


"Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego replied to him, “King Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to deliver us from it, and he will deliver us from Your Majesty’s hand. But even if he does not, we want you to know, Your Majesty, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up.”

Daniel 3:16‭-‬18 

I simply opened my Bible this morning to read....I do that often....nearly 100% of the time God is faithful in showing me something I need to see....no exception this morning. 

Yesterday, again, I scurried against time to send documentation for my mom's Medicaid Waiver. It's been a long few months...two denials thus far....I can't help but wonder why.....she has.....nothing ...not sure how many more ways I can prove it. 

A friend quoted, to calm my anxiousness, Ephesians 6:13, "Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to STAND."

That verse came right to mind as I scrambled to gather the needed documents. But then this morning....I am always blown away by Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego's ability to stand firm..... EVEN IF they are thrown into the fiery furnace...which of course, we know they were.

In some weird way I feel like I have been in the fiery furnace for months now. The testing of my faith has been brutal...at least to me. King Nebuchadnezzar used fear as a tactic for obedience.....the government, I feel, does the same thing. 

Nebuchadnezzar ordered the furnace heated seven times hotter than usual.....with each denial...I feel the same. Time is not on my side.....

So, in such confusing and anxious times, what do I know for certain? I know that I am not alone. 

"Then King Nebuchadnezzar leaped to his feet in amazement and asked his advisers, “Weren’t there three men that we tied up and threw into the fire?” They replied, “Certainly, Your Majesty.” He said, “Look! I see four men walking around in the fire, unbound and unharmed, and the fourth looks like a son of the gods.”
Daniel 3:24‭-‬25

Unbound and unharmed.....how beautiful is the picture of those who are not alone in the fire? How do I stand? I'm not alone in the fire!!

Then Nebuchadnezzar said, “Praise be to the God of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, who has sent his angel and rescued his servants! They trusted in him and defied the king’s command and were willing to give up their lives rather than serve or worship any god except their own God.
Daniel 3:28

Such an amazing story of faith and trust. One I needed to read this morning. 

God never leaves us in the fiery furnace alone.....EVER......

Sometimes he rescues us altogether..sometimes he's in it with us...but he's NEVER absent. Such a good reminder why we, as Christ followers, can stand in really difficult circumstances.

"So Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego came out of the fire, and the satraps, prefects, governors and royal advisers crowded around them. They saw that the fire had not harmed their bodies, nor was a hair of their heads singed; their robes were not scorched, and there was no smell of fire on them."
Daniel 3:26‭-‬27

I, too, will come out of the fire, neither harmed, singed or scorched. 

I should not be surprised but instead encouraged.....

Dear friends, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal that has come on you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you."
1 Peter 4:12

I love the Word of God! There is absolutely nothing that happens in my life for which there is no answer. 

"You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart."
Jeremiah 29:13

Reminds me of this beautiful song. Transformation is painful...but I can have rest even in the midst.

🎶🎶 In every high, in every low
On mountain tops, down broken roads
You're still my rock, my hope remains
I'll rest in the arms of Jesus
Come what may 🎶🎶

Rest in his arms...

Be blessed today.

Monday, October 10, 2022

Future Joy


Future Joy

Those two words were on my mind in the wee hours one morning last week. Why? I don't know. Most mornings as I begin to stir I ask God what my day might look like. I already knew that day....or so I thought..... it was the day before retreat. It's always a busy one....filled with many tasks, packing, last minute unpredictable "stuff". Each "day before" has held some kind of "frenzy". I expected it! But FUTURE JOY? What had God already set in motion? What was this future joy? How exciting! The very thought stirred eager anticipation in my heart. I couldn't help but think of these scripture verses. Jesus thought about future joy. It was his existence. He knew that that is why he LIVED. He lived for the joy set before him. He endured for it!!

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith. For the THE JOY SET BEFORE HIM he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
Hebrews 12:1‭-‬3


FOR THE JOY SET BEFORE HIM...... FUTURE JOY!!

I began to ask myself: When might I experience this future joy and what might it look like? Is it tomorrow? Next week? Next month? Is it when my schedule slows down? When I check things off my massive to-do list? Is it when my mom finally gets settled? Is it when I lose those pesky 50lbs? When I create healthier habits? Pay off some bills? All of the above? None of the above?

Oh....I know the right answer.....the proper answer. There is nothing on this earth that can set your mind in proper perspective. For whatever reason, striving, in my own strength, for the wrong things or circumstances is, I would guess, a pretty common response. In other words, I'm not alone. But there is no comfort in knowing others are in the same boat. Is it comforting to know other's have suffered loss therefore, at least I'm not alone? No. I remember a young woman who was dying of cancer. I said to her, "I'm so sorry this is happening to you?" She said...and I'll never forget it ...."If not me, than who?" We don't wish others to suffer so we're not alone in our circumstances. It really is of zero comfort. Yes, there's a camaraderie a commonality, a bearing of one another's burdens, a listening ear, a warm hug, a text, a phone call.....this is the body of Christ...the unity of the Spirit and it's BEAUTIFUL and it's RIGHT and it's LOVELY.......but not once would you ever wish someone else to be afflicted.....ever.....

The retreat was amazing! Time away from the business of the world. Quiet..... peace..... fellowship.....a common purpose. ..to glorify our God. There is nothing more we should desire than a deep, personal relationship with our Creator. Was this the future joy? Indeed joy was alive and moving about. But was this joy the future joy God was talking about that morning?

I thought about those verses.....Jesus was going to endure the cross...yet, he set his eyes on his Father. He set his eyes on his future joy. His joy was returning to his Father's right hand. His future joy was not the relief of his suffering or a desire to be popular, or handsome or successful or wealthy. NO! His future joy WAS his Father in eternity! It is no different for me, a follower of Christ. MY future joy is sitting at his feet for eternity. Joy on earth, if tied to our circumstances, will be fleeting....it will never last for this world is always changing. Sometimes the change happens so slowly you barely realize it and sometimes it's so abrupt it rocks everything you ever thought you knew.

In this world you WILL have trouble....you will have busy schedules, you will deal with prickly people, you will experience many disappointments......and sorrow and suffering cannot be avoided......and God's Word is not silent on these things. In fact, he has told us beforehand that we would not be surprised.

"I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me."
Galatians 2:20


Oh.....I might have missed that ...not really.....

"But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as from the Lord, the Spirit."
2 Corinthians 3:18


When I became a follower of Christ the veil was removed from my eyes. I KNOW! I can no longer NOT see. I am being transformed day by day into his likeness.

For the joy set before me, that future joy, I endure the cross, just like Christ. I am to pick it up DAILY and carry it. My future joy is the same future joy for which Christ endured! I can enjoy momentary joy day to day but it's always temporary......always..... circumstances will always change and upset the delicate balance....but if I can set my sight on future joy, knowing 100% it's forever.....knowing it will never perish and never fade I can actually experience joy right now, every single moment of every single day. Deep abiding joy now, despite our circumstances, is a beautiful thing though it cannot compare to the future joy of walking with Jesus.

Future joy! I can, daily, with excited anticipation, live for THAT day regardless of life's circumstances. Praise God!

Be blessed today!

Monday, October 3, 2022

Build a boat....




Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.
Matthew 11:29


Saturday proved to be a unique ending to a very busy week.....it wasn't that there were no places to go or things to do....instead I made the choice to rest. I NEVER do that. When I first began to ponder making that decision, guilt reared its ugly head shouting, "You should _______." Fill in the blank......

In the "old" days we called it a "mental health" day. I never did that either. 🙄

I love this explanation of rest for your soul:

"The soul refers to the mind, will, and the emotions. So Jesus is saying He will give us peace of mind. He will give us rest in decision making, and He will give us emotional stability."

I want that!!

So what does sitting at the feet of Jesus, in a quiet house, alone, look like. Praying finds me asking God to show me what he would have for me. And he answers.....it's a miraculous thing....I don't claim to understand it.....I just KNOW it. So here's what he showed me. WARNING: Hard stuff.....😢

All day I thought about Noah. Noah was a righteous man in the eyes of the people of his day. He was called blameless and he was devoted and obedient to God. When God commanded him to build a boat, proclaiming rain would come and the earth would be flooded, what did Noah do? He built the boat ...he built that boat for 75 YEARS!! He built a boat in a desert land that had never seen rain and was not near a body of water. Who does that? Noah did.... without question, without concern and with complete confidence and trust. When it was time God commanded Noah to gather two of each animal....and as always, Noah was obedient......but here's the part that is so amazing to me....

In Genesis 7:4 the Lord says, to Noah, "Seven days from now I WILL SEND rain on the earth for forty days and forty nights, and I will wipe from the face of the earth every living creature I have made.”


And then verse 10, "And after the seven days the floodwaters came on the earth."

Verse 13 says, "On that very day....."

Do you suppose it just happened that it began to rain? Or did God CAUSE it to rain? He said, "I WILL send rain ..." This is a really hard concept. How could a loving and kind and compassionate God purposely cause such tragedy? Millions of people, children and animals died.....though heartbreaking I understand that question...... sadly.....it took YEARS for me to understand how God orders tragedy that befalls those who profess their love for him. Those who give their lives to him. And how, like Noah, can I learn to follow with blind faith....with confidence that God has already written my story and the stories of those I love? Here's how I've finally made some sense of that which seems senseless.

Psalm 139:16 gave me the peace I sought for years.

"Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be."

Do I believe it? Do I believe all of my days were ordained before one of them came to be? Do I believe God's Word? ALL OF IT? Am I all in? As long as God, in my mind, is loving and kind, he's palatable......but talk about his Sovereignty and his rendering  justice and all of a sudden he's not as easy to accept. It's so much more reasonable to blame sin in the world than to believe that God caused unbearable pain, right? Is it easier to accept that the God of wrath in the Old Testament left the building when the Jesus of the New Testament arrived on the scene? NO! THEY ARE ONE!! There are not two Gods. A mean one and a nice one. One Sovereign God over ALL!

But here's what I finally understand.....something that, two years ago still escaped me.....if I believe all my days were ordered....if I believe that my beloved's days were completed on that horrible, horrible day than everything that happened that day had to be from God's hand. Nothing in this world could perfectly come together unless God ordered it. I spent years asking why. There are no answers that satisfy that why but, if I believe that my beloved's numbered days came to fruition that day; if I believe God's Word; I have to believe that God is in control of that day, of those events. 

God's word never promises that bad things won't happen.....what he does promise is that he'll walk with me through it and he'll change me through it and I'll be different; changed......and I am! I don't understand it, I don't try to analyze it and I certainly don't ask "why" anymore. It's a huge step in faith to believe that from the day God called me, my book was written....beginning to end and NOTHING happens in my life that is not directly from his hand. And just like Noah, God will ask me to do and experience things that don't make sense to me. Things I can't comprehend. It is no surprise to him. It is all planned. Do I trust him to write my story? Noah did.

Be blessed today.

Wednesday, July 27, 2022

That you may abound in every good work....

 


Rest is defined as “peace, ease or refreshment.” 

So this is interesting...at least to me. Each day, usually at the close of it, I begin to ask God to reveal to me something that he was trying to show me....he has been so faithful since I began to intentionally pray that way a couple of months ago. As he gives me the words I write them down. As I began to pray last night, I really couldn't hear anything.

Yesterday I did not leave my house....at all....all day...all evening. God provided an amazing day to my mom. Pain was controlled, she ate well, physical therapy went well, at the end of the day SHE texted ME to sleep well.....God provided a good day for her SO THAT I could rest without worry. I didn't see it yesterday but as I ponder it....of course I see it now. Look at that definition for rest again..... peace, ease, refreshment. 

I had time. Time to clean my porch, do some ministry work, do some laundry for my mom, cook a meal for myself, crochet, read, write, play fetch with Penelope and just hang out. Is that why, at the end of the day, I thought I had no great epiphany to share? I mean I didn't leave my house. I didn't interact with any people. So how could God really show me anything.

But God......

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."

Matthew 11:28 

See, when I stop believing that God KNOWS exactly what I need I miss what he is revealing to me. God orchestrated an incredibly quiet day for a worn out old lady. What does his word say? These familiar verses popped right into my mind:

"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."(Matt. 6:33)

And this one:

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind’ (Matt. 22:37). 

And this one:

“So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God” (1 Corinthians 10:31).

No one but me and Jesus, period. I don't need to be doing something or be surrounded by people for him to teach me or to reveal something to me.

Today didn't exactly start as I would have planned.....

I got up very early this morning and decided to slip back into bed for a bit to pray and think..... honestly that is very rare...even rarer that that "bit" turned into nearly two hours. Now I could beat myself up and think, "Geez Dianna, the day is half over!" Or I can thank God for providing me with exactly what I needed at the exact time I needed it. Times of refreshing will come but most of the time we don't see it or we refuse to and push through. 

Since I've begun to rekindle my homebody status I've found balance to be difficult. Well ....that might be a half truth..... nope....it's a lie 🤥 I want to stay home and embrace my inner homebody when I don't want to do the task at hand. I'm never not honest so here goes...I don't want to see my mom like this. I want to see the mom that makes bologna sandwiches slathered with butter and mayo. I want to see the mom who is cranking out her 500th blanket. I want to see the mom who delivers hot banana bread to her neighbors. I want to see the mom who laughs and loves like her very life depends on it. I want to turn back time for her. I don't want her to suffer. I don't want to see my mom like this. I want to go visit not because I HAVE to...not because it's an obligation...but because she's my mom and no matter what that is still true. Today is one of those days. Honestly, I'm already anxious. 😫 I'd love to stay home again today....but that is avoidance NOT God provided respite, right?

"Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies."

1 Corinthians 6:19‭-‬20 

I read this verse with a different heart this morning. Usually, for me, it's about physical health and while that is part of it, the other part is spiritual health. Yesterday God provided for me a day of spiritual fitness. Truly a much needed gift.....one HE knew I needed even if I didn't. It was a teaching moment and I don't have to be sad that I didn't see it yesterday..... I can rejoice that I saw it today!! God's not beating me up, rolling his eyes and thinking, "Will she EVER learn?" He loves me. He desires good things for me. He wants me to rest IN him and NOT be anxious. 

In the last six months I've thought more about the Israelites in the desert than I ever imagined I would. They would have rather gone back into slavery than to be free in the wilderness. Why? Because at least they weren't hungry. Isn't it funny what we'll trade for comfort? 

I am grateful for yesterday. I see now that God provided it for me to replenish me for today's uncomfortableness....these days are not going to be comfortable...these days are filled with growing pains....and they are going to grow me in ways I may not see immediately and maybe not until I get to heaven. But I must never take God out of the equation. 

".....one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.

Ephesians 4:6


Over ALL
Through ALL
In ALL

Today I'm going to try to walk in God's strength....purposely CHOOSING to not allow my mind and heart to travel further.

Be blessed today.

Tuesday, July 26, 2022

So God made a dog....



Psalm 121 asks, "Where does my help come from?" And the answer is: "My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth."

How exactly? 

Psalm 16:8 answers the how AND the result. "I keep my eyes always on the Lord. With him at my right hand, I will not be shaken."

Yesterday God provided the where, how and the result in a very physical example. Nearly five months ago he sent to me a puppy.... I had no idea if I was making the right choice...if she was THE one or should I get a dog at all. One thing I now know for sure; she has helped in ways I could never have imagined. I was reminded of the popular 2013 Ram trucks commercial (a take off of Paul Harvey's 1978 speech "So God made a Farmer") called So God made a Dog. You can watch it here, try not to tear up 🥰

https://youtu.be/VDrabmm421I

Yesterday I took Miss Penelope Joy to visit my mom. I was praying she would bring a smile to my mom's face.....what I couldn't have imagined is that she would crawl up on her bed and snuggle in. She's a bit timid but she is also very smart! 🥰 It's like she has this ability, a sense if you will, that comfort was needed. Brings back memories of other dogs we've had, who would lay all day with someone who wasn't feeling well. I began to ponder what God might have been thinking when he created animals. I found a really touching article. Here are snippets from it with the link posted at the end.

"At the very beginning, God blessed the people He had made and commanded them, “Fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air and over every living creature that moves on the ground” (Genesis 1:28).

"When a child maintains an aquarium, for example, he or she is reflecting the nature of God, to a certain extent. The child creates the environment for the fish to live in, maintains the habitat, and feeds and cares for the creatures in the tank."

"Keeping a pet, then, is a weighty responsibility—it is modeling the Creator and exercising dominion over a portion of creation."

"Pets also provide companionship, amusement, and unconditional love. It’s why pets are taken to hospitals and nursing homes to interact with people in need. Any animal that helps us show love more freely is a good thing."

Full article here:https://www.gotquestions.org/Bible-pets.html

"Any animal that helps us show love more freely is a good thing."

I can't help but think AGAIN as I have over the last months that God will use what's in our hands to teach us, train us, grow us, enable us, provide for us ALL that we need. Yes, God will use a dog. He used Penelope to give my mom great joy and comfort and for me, he provided an "instrument" by which he blessed me. See, I could never have known five months ago that:

1. Life would turn in the ways that it has.
2. My mom would have a major health crisis.
3. I would get a dog
4. It would be Penelope
5. God would use her
6. I would not only give God all the glory for his amazing plan but that I would not even entertain the idea that credit be given to anyone other than God.

As I sit here on this cool, crisp morning I feel a bit like an excited teenager who has been gifted a car. I can never quite grasp how God works. His plan for me is unique TO ME. It is mine, it is personal. God already knew five months ago that he was going to send me a dog with a lot of personality, very smart and so unique in looks that people are drawn to her. He knew about my momma and he knew Penelope would bring her joy amidst very bad circumstances. And his reveals are timed perfectly. I could not have orchestrated a better plan. Why do I think I can?

Today is a day of rest. I have zero on my schedule.....a mental health day if you will. Ever so slowly I'm learning to balance this life. But more than that I'm learning that God will show me when to move and when to be still. His timing is perfect. I don't have to fret. Here's a short albeit personal realization.....my hair is beginning to fall out...again....this time I don't need to turn to medical professionals.....I know it's stress. I once had a doctor say, "You need to control your stress". I laughed....just how does one do that? What I know today are two things.

1. Stay as close to God as one can possibly be.
2. Take the time that is needed to do number one.

Today I'm so grateful. As I've tossed the ball over and over again I realized that just for me...for my own unique plan...

God sent a dog. ❤️


Be blessed today.

Monday, July 25, 2022

When not if....


 "When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze."

Isaiah 43:2 

I woke up early this morning praying today would not be like yesterday. Before I crawled out of bed, grudgingly, I thought of the above scripture. Notice it says, "WHEN you pass through the waters" and WHEN you pass through the rivers" and "WHEN you walk through the fire". There are no "ifs"......clearly it WILL happen. I can't avoid it, I can't wish it away, there is no secret spell or potion.....it's as exhausting to try to find a resolution as it is to live in it.

So I got up, turned around and looked at my bed and realized that it had not been made in a week. At my house that is unheard of. My standard operating procedure is get up, make the bed. Now you might say it's not big deal.....but, to me, making my bed is normal. Sure you could call it mundane, a chore, unnecessary....I mean life hasn't changed because my bed isn't made. So what? But my unmade bed is just the beginning of my shaken routine. Nothing is normal. Life upended. No routine, no rhythm. If you get up everyday and profess to "flying by the seat of your pants" I would argue that is just not true. Life has rhythm....so entreached we don't even think about it until it's not there. For me this means dishes in the sink, piles of laundry, unswept floors, dust you can write in.....all daily tasks that are usually done without even thinking about it. It's not the tasks that aren't done that bothers me. It's my very life turned upside down and inside out. 

I've been shook before.....so deeply crushed that I didn't care if anything got done ever again...but slowly I realized that routine is a good thing.....and this time I CRAVE it. Sometimes I wonder how God came up with this plan for my life and how he thinks it will grow and mature me in him. Did my husband have to die....did my dad have to die....did my brother have to move away all those years ago to set in motion that I would be alone to take care of my mother and her needs and all totaled, be who he saw in my unformed body? I'm guessing the answer is yes. My mom asks, "why?" every time I see her. I don't ask that question anymore....there is no answer for me but knowing Christ, so surely there is zero rhyme or reason to someone who does not know him.

John 16:33 says, “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you WILL have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

In this world I WILL have trouble...but look at the promises in God's word: 

I HAVE overcome the world!! I WILL be with you! The rivers WILL NOT sweep over you! You WILL NOT be burned! I did a bit of research and found many sources agreeing that there are over 7,000 promises in God's Word. There are 31,173 verses in the Bible. A promise nearly every 4 to 5 verses. I found that to be an amazing statistic. 

Walking with God does not promise a perfect, pain free life. We live in a fallen world....a world full of bad choices at best and devastating, life changing decisions at worst. Life IS hard. Life IS sad. Life IS uncertain. Life IS painful. Life IS unpredictable. Life WILL shake routine. Life WILL destroy our rhythm. Amidst MUCH joy there WILL be much sorrow. 

ONE thing I can count on 100% of the time is this: God is on the throne!! And he promises I will not drown...even when it feels like it. Even when life is upside down. Even when routine is shattered. Even when the rhythm of life is interrupted.

I've read that one of the hardest things for a child when taking care of an elderly parent is self-care. This is true in all parts of life. If you're a mother you know how hard it is to take care of your own needs once you have a child. Taking care of oneself seems selfish. We must sacrifice ourselves on the alter of wonder woman. The sooner we learn that that is a lie of the enemy the better able we become in taking care of self.

How do you do it? I'm not sure. I know how NOT to do it......make yourself so sick with worry that you are gagging to the point of vomiting....live in panic of all the "what ifs" and projecting all the things you think will happen when you really have no idea. And the consistent thought that will not leave your mind, if my beloved was here he would rescue me.....pull me down from the ceiling. Yesterday was a hard day. Today is a new day. The waters DID rush over me but I did not drown. The fire DID lap at my heals but I did not get burnt. 

My mom keeps thinking she will get better. She cries when it still hurts and I have to gently remind her it's not going to. See, she passed that on to me. I, too, want it all to go away miraculously! This trial may end tomorrow or next year or five years from now....I don't know. I either learn to live in God's promises or by my own doing, I WILL drown.

As I sit here this morning, I'm already a tad nervous. I feel like the last couple of years I've been in one uncomfortable circumstance after another.....actually that IS true...not just something I'm feeling.....I HATE it but I cannot argue that I AM growing and changing. As I begin to teach and lead this Fall, there is no doubt God is equipping me. Why? Why this way? No sense in even asking the question. There is no answer I would understand. And it is not for me to understand...it is my opportunity to take it all in and learn from it. God, what are you trying to teach me? How are you trying to grow me? How does this trial make me more like you? And here's a really big question that I'm asking today......how can I do what I need to do AND take care of myself? How do I restore the "normal" rhythms of my life while taking care of the current circumstances? 

"How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and every day have sorrow in my heart? How long will my enemy triumph over me?" (Psalm 13:2) David may start this way, pouring his heart out to God....where are you? When will I see You? Is this forever? What I love about God is his broad shoulders. He desires to hear our broken hearts. He can handle our anger and sadness. He wants that kind of relationship with us. And when we are ready, he speaks...and we hear him....and in ways I'll never understand we begin to praise him IN the storm. David ends his lament this way: "But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation. I will sing to the Lord, for he has been good to me."

My time with Jesus each morning is so precious to me. I always, always feel better, more equipped and ready to start my day. 

Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.”

Lamentations 3:22‭-‬24 

Today, I'm going to rest in knowing that God's got it even if it doesn't all look like I think it should. I've already made my bed....maybe I'll tackle that sink full of dishes. Normal is good. Rhythm CAN happen even in uncertainty.

Be blessed today.

Sunday, July 24, 2022

Trust

 


"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight."
Proverbs 3:5‭-‬6


My mom got moved and settled into rehab.....I was so apprehensive....when we got there her room was not prepared...the transport people made up her bed....they said, "It's not worth it to ask." 😳 Then they quickly said, "Oh, she'll be fine." Staff, what there was, pretty much ignored us. 😳😳😳 I had so many questions but nobody came. 😳😳😳😳 I'm praying, "Lord, please show me this is not what it seems". Finally, I go out to the nurses desk and as I began to ask questions another woman walked up. I began telling them, passionately, what I wanted most for my mom.....the management of her pain. The biggest problem is that the pain is not from the hip repair, which is why she is there, but her foot. I shared with them bit a of who my mom is. It's important for them not to assume she is a patient with dementia. I told them that two short months ago she was cooking and baking banana bread. Her aide decided she would have to stay longer and they'd get her into the kitchen. 😊 We laughed, the ice was broken....awkwardness abated.

Her aide began to do the routine "stuff".....with three masks and a face shield on. When I told her it was okay to remove them she promptly responded, "Oh no I cant." Apprehension reared it's head again. I could barely hear or understand her.....mom never would. 🥺 All the stories you hear come flooding in.....I thought I would vomit right there on the spot.

"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart."
Jeremiah 29:11‭-‬13


She asked if mom needed anything...was she hungry....too warm, too hot....she decided on MacDonald's.....before I left I asked the aid for her TV remote. She went and found one....handed it to me and said, "You'll have to handle this one. I don't watch TV." I joked with her "Never", I said. Then she said this....."Nope! I work two jobs. 7 to 3 and 3 to 11, I go to church and I read my Bible.

"Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act."
Psalm 37:5


I followed her out of the room and told her that my mom is not saved. To which she replied, "Everyone is born into sin." I told her I wanted nothing more than for my mom to know the Lord so she should feel free to talk about God all she wanted!! We both chuckled but deep down I felt my heart say, "Thank you Lord for your amazing provision."

I went to McDonald's for our dinner and to the store for some pretty, fresh nighties, returned to enjoy dinner and heartfelt conversation. She agreed to call me (she promised) if anything happened or felt wrong. Our agreed upon goal is that she'll work really hard and we'll get her out of there and hopefully back to a familiar setting. I'm beginning to look at some alternative options for help and care. She is my momma and she deserves the best.

Today I'm going to take Miss P in for a visit. It's a new day, new mercies.

"You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you. Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord God is an everlasting rock."
Isaiah 26:3‭-‬4

Perfect peace.....I'm going to rest there today.

Happy Celebration Sunday!

Rest in his arms....

"Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego replied to him, “King Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. If ...