Result

 

Benign - The one word everyone wants to hear

So I told my Bible study ladies that God had directed me to the book of Daniel and the story of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego (see yesterday's post). They told King Nebuchadnezzar that EVEN IF he threw them into the fiery furnace they would not turn from their God. I declared out loud to the ladies that EVEN IF the result is cancer I will not turn from my God.

I cannot begin to express the fear of that proclamation! I've always been afraid that if I speak something out loud it will be true....even if it is, in fact, true. Speaking the words....maybe not so much about truth because you can't get around it..... perhaps makes it REAL. It has to be dealt with. Speaking that "C" word brought tears and fear and a knowledge that it could be me but it's also many. I fondly remember a young woman that had been in my small group...years and years ago.....diagnosed with cancer.....I didn't know what to say to her so I said, "I am so sorry this is happening to you" and her response is something I've never forgotten....she said, "If not me, then who?"

I realize how often, and in many circumstances that phrase could be used. For me, if I had a choice, if it was to be me and not my child, I'd volunteer. Really makes me think of all that goes on in the world around me. If something doesn't affect me or my family do I heave a huge sigh of relief, "Phew....". Do I proclaim how blessed I am and say, "WOW, God's favor really rests on me". Do I turn a blind eye to those who don't seem to have favor? No housing, no jobs, no family, bad health, chronic illness, mental illness? Do I make excuses, "Well I worked hard for what I have. Let them do the same." In other words, whatever it is, if it doesn't affect me, am I fine with that? Let it be someone else's problem.

When my beloved was killed by someone who made a really bad choice, who thought they were invincible, perhaps thought, "I'm okay to drive", someone who made a really selfish decision that day, well....that decision changed the course of my entire family's life forever. I hate the position she put my family in but I am not so naive to think that I'm not just one bad choice away from where she is today. How do my attitudes and choices affect others? Apathy? Indifference? Do I say, "Glad it's not me?" Because on "that" day it was me. No one is exempt from pain and heartache.

"Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. If anyone thinks they are something when they are not, they deceive themselves. Each one should test their own actions. Then they can take pride in themselves alone, without comparing themselves to someone else, for each one should carry their own load." Galatians 6:2-5

What is the law spoken here?

"A new commandment (law) I give you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this you will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another." John 12:34-35

Sooooo this trial that God has had me in for over three weeks now, the waiting, the wondering, the worrying has helped me understand IT COULD BE ME this time! There was zero comfort in thinking, "It's not going to be that" "I already lost a husband, I'm cleared for the rest of my life from bad "stuff"......

"In this world you WILL have trouble.  But take heart! I have overcome the world." John 16:33

BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE AND GOOD THINGS HAPPEN TO BAD PEOPLE. Lord, let me not be so prideful to think I am exempt.

Yesterday I talked about the waning days of summer and how I've been simply praying and opening my Bible. God is so faithful.....I opened to the book of Micah. I've read through the Bible many times but since it is living and active, it teaches, revives and uplifts the soul. And today, on Day 5, he, AGAIN, showed me where to focus. The people who were delivered from slavery in Egypt are complaining. 

In Chapter Six God speaks and tells them what he has done for them. 

"My people, what have I done to you? How have I burdened you? Answer me. I brought you up out of Egypt and redeemed you from the land of slavery." He reminds them of what he has done. 

And then he says this:

"And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God." Micah 6:8

It doesn't matter what happens in this earthly life. It doesn't matter how unfair it seems. It does NOT matter if it's my cancer and someone carries the burden with me or if it's someone else's cancer and I help to carry their burden alongside them. Carrying someone else's burden simply means walking alongside a struggling brother or sister and help shoulder the weight of a trial or temptation that threatens to pull them under. No matter the result I still have work to do in the kingdom!

And I will close with this beautiful scripture from Habakkuk 3:17-18

Though the fig tree does not bud

and there are no grapes on the vines,

though the olive crop fails

and the fields produce no food,

though there are no sheep in the pen

and no cattle in the stalls,

yet I will rejoice in the Lord,

I will be joyful in God my Savior.

This time the result was good. I pray that the next time, for there will be a next time, whether it's health related or something else, I will remember the lessons taught in this time of waiting.