Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Peace....what a ride....

Monday was my consultation for my tummy troubles and I must say, though it was just a consult, I was quite nervous. Whether I was afraid of what the doctor might say or just realized that the procedure I would have to go through would soon become a reality, I was nervous.

A few weeks ago when I was visiting my best friend, I talked to her about my "need" to worry endlessly about that which I cannot change. It's become a torment for me, straight from the devil and I'm letting him win. She said something that had a profound affect on me.....she said "there is a difference between necessary concern and needless worry. REALLY?!! I must admit, what she said made sense. For so long now I've been very hard on myself. Trying to live to a perfect standard though I know I could never be perfect. Unattainable goals........

So I gave myself permission to be concerned about my doctor's appointment but I was still praying for God to give me some peace. The doctor was very nice and very comforting. He told me really there was nothing to worry about. That was when I did what I so often do.......cry! The let down of pent up emotion, fear, worry, anxiety........He was taken back by my tears and asked me if I'd like to take the canceled appointment he had for the next morning so that I could stop worrying. I said "YES!" and I have to tell you, it was then, like a huge burden, had been lifted from me.

Even though I had the prep work and the procedures to go through I was calm and peaceful. I went home, got in the Word and I was truly at peace. It was, as if, something just washed over me and all the fear was gone. Of course, I know it was God, answering my prayers!

I was NOT afraid! I did not have the usual "symptoms" that are always part of my worry. It was amazing! After I was all finished all I had to do was rest for the day. I spent the entire day with God.....reading, studying, researching......just me and God ALL DAY! Of course I found some miraculous things like I ALWAYS do!

I read three devotionals......

#1 -I am your Healer, your Joy. With noiseless footsteps I draw near to you. I need no agonized pleading. Your need is My Call.----The Two Listeners

#2 - And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Col 3:15

#3 - "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why for Christ's sake I delight in weaknesses, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. 2 Cor 12:9

Imagine my surprise when I saw how these passages spoke DIRECTLY to me in my time of need! I experienced God's grace and God's peace and it felt so good. If I was a perfect human being I would have no need for God and I would never experience that feeling. Now I know why God gives me challenges, trials, tests, temptations...whatever you want to call them.....so that I HAVE to find my peace IN HIM! It's how He draws me to Him! It's how He gets my attention! It's how he PROVES He loves me! It shows me how patient He is with me! It shows me how He will never leave me. Above all, it continues to grow my faith, to grow my trust......

Lesson learned! We serve an AMAZING God!

Have a GOD day!
XOXO

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